What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

what do you call a black man living in Brooklyn making over ten-thousand dollars a week? a hard worker

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

whats up and also down? your mum

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

How did the Muslim girl get pregnant? She was brutally raped on the streets of Baghdad.

There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

What's a black man's favorite fruit? Clementines.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

A blond went to a barber to get her hair cut. She had her ear phones in and tolled the barber not to take her ear phones out at all. So the barber was swiching her ear phones to cut her hair then she fell asleep so the barber took both of her ear phones off for a minute and then she died

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

An Englishman walks into a bar.

why did the baby cross the road i tied it to the back of a car

how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

How many christians does it take to change a light bulb? No one knows, by the time they finish unscrewing the burned out light, a hi-jacked plane crashes into them.

Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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