dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

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What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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So a woman walks into a store... There's a lamp selling for $5.99. She buys it because she thinks that's a pretty good deal.

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Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to give him a bad reputation, but not enough to kill him

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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What is black and white and red all over? A black, red and white picture

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I need to start studying.

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Whats long and red all over? This Cut on my arm, i should get it checked out.

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Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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why are black people good at basketball cuz their tall

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When is a door not a door? Never.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops