“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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I have a friend named David. He then lost his ID, now we called him Dav

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Rishi has popcorn while wass n jess r making jokes on anti jokes

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Sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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COME HERE, POTTER!!!! NOW!!! Instead of agreeing to approach the source of the rather hostile summoning, Potter decided to sit down and eat a healthy vegetarian lunch of sausages and chips.

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You know what's funny about AIDS? Nothing.

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Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

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What is my name? I dont know

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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PEANIS!

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Saggy Nipples By chan chan

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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Roses are red lemons are sour open Your legs and gimme an hour!

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Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why did the Muslim boy crash a plane into a building? Because the remote-controlled plane suddenly malfuctioned and crashed into a nearby apartment complex.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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