person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

thumb_up thumb_down

Whenever someone asks you why you're sad, always remember this simple answer so that people won't keep asking you more questions: "Because Hitler died"

thumb_up thumb_down

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Delaware? A coat.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did haris die...............................................his hair blond? .. u

thumb_up thumb_down

Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's white and is your slave? Your computer.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is ur chest as flat as ur back?

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

thumb_up thumb_down

http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

thumb_up thumb_down

Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

thumb_up thumb_down

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

thumb_up thumb_down

As a stand-up comedian, I've been really interested in how comedians have recovered from jokes not hitting making fun of the fact. Recently, I was in a situation where a rhetorical question didn't hit, and anti-joking (lamenting on the lack of a punchline sarcastically) ended up generating the laugh I needed to move on! Hurray for Anti-jokes! Me: You know the gym Extreme Fitness? Audience: SILENCE Me: (sarcastically) Yes, exactly. That's exactly how that interaction went in my mind when I was practising at home. I ask question - audience responds euphorically - I continue with my joke... http://michaeljagdeo.wordpress.com/2012/01/29/anti-jokes-how-to-recover-when-a-joke-doesnt-hit/

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the last thing to go through a flys head when it hits your windshield? Its ass.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a bloody Jewish guy nailed to a piece of wood. Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down

a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

thumb_up thumb_down

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

thumb_up thumb_down

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops