Knock Knock, Ow my face

Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

scraggle is in you pillow case

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

what happened when glen haire jumped of a high building? he died.

why is 6 scared of 7 because 7 is scary...

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, I do not stand for them.

Moral

What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

My friend harris is fat.

Q: What's the hardest part about throwing a baby down the stairs? A: My dick.

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

Bend over Touch your toes I'll show you where The monster goes

why did the chicken cross the road cause i fucked your mom

I had a quad when I was in high school, she was pretty but it was hard to get her out of the wheelchair.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...