Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless he's a witch doctor, then you'll need an apple and some ayaheusca. The fractal dream will destroy time and space as consciousness returns upon itself at times end

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Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

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What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, the answer is to get to the other side, but this is an anti-joke site so I don't know why as it can't be it.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? It's Jim. Jim who? I'm your son, Jim. Are you losing your memory?

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Chuck Norris is so strong that he could bench almost 250 pounds in his heyday.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

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Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

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Why did the house burn down? Obama

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Q:What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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What do you call a frog with a bow tie? Cute!

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What's the difference between a black guy and an asian. They come from different race groups.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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What happened to Bilbo? He shit his pants.

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Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

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I wrote a funny joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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