what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

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I bought a pound of gold for my new gold ring, later that day I lost it

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Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

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How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the Mortgage company. You haven't payed your loans. The man loses his house and becomes homeless.

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Did you hear about the 2 pretzels walking down the street? It's not true, pretzels are not capable of autonomous movement.

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Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

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Q. What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? A. Get in the car Robin.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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What do you call a black kid with no parents? A black orphan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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