A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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A blonde boards a plane and sits in first class. Another passenger sees the blonde in his seat and tells her she's in the wrong seat. "I'm not moving!" says the blonde. The passenger calls over the flight attendant. "Ma'am, you're supposed to be seated in economy class," says the flight attendant. "Please come with me." "No! I'm not moving!" The flight attendant informs the pilot. The pilot comes out, whispers in the blonde's ear, and then the two have wild sex, right in the open. Oh my God, you should have been there. She had the most incredible rack ever!!!

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;iub

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How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

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why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

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How do the american stop getting fat ? They don't.

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Whats greasy and long? Your moms chesthair

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Why did the joke feel paranoid? Because everyone kept laughing at him.

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Q: What's DNA? A: The National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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who ate all the food in zimbabwe? Nick bigg.. he later died of cancer and aids

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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What did the plane say to the twin towers? Boom

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human centipede

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Your Face.

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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Q: Why did the girl have dirty knees? A: Cause she was dragged through the forest and raped.

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Do you want to hear a good anti-joke? Well I don't have one.

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why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops