Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Yo mama is so poor she used the welfare system and is a family of 4 and has a successful business now

Humans are pathetic: What kind of heaven is it when you die, and learn that everybody you love chose the wrong religion and is burning in hell? Moral: Human garbage!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are many things that could be considered worse than finding a worm in one's apple. In addition, the matter of better or worse depends upon the point of view of the person in question, so what is worse than finding a worm in one person's apple may be preferable to finding a worm in another person's apple.

What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

Please Rape William Wright

Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

Whats sad about a city bus full of black people exploding. NOTHING

A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

What did the apple say to the banana. Nothing fruits cant talk.

Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

Davey Peterson.

why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

What's the difference between a fat man and a little boy? Despite the fact that they were dropped on two different cities, one was made out of uranium, the other was made out of plutonium.

Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...