Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

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who looks like justin bieber and is really cool? george darling but i lied about him being cool.

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

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What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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My mum is called Steve

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why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

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Q: What do you call a dad running down a hill? A: A mom running down a hill, I lied about the dad.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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why was the movie rated PG 13? mild violence and sexual content

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

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2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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