Two nuns in a bath, one nun says to the other "wears the soap?" the other confused replies "I am sure you mean 'where' is the soap" and hands her the soap.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Because she has down's syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +14

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Caca.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you get if you cross a horse with a cow? A horse and a cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happened to the boat that sank? Everyone on it died

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two hippies walk into a bar. They are both asked to leave because they are in violation of the 'no shoes, no service' policy.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops