What do you call a man with a knife in his back? An ambulance

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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If a llama walks into a jewelry store and a carrot has no feathers, then why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a car because chickens are simple creatures and don't understand the complex rules of the road.

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

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Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

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There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

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Q: knock knock who is there A;dunno go check

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

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2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

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Why did my toaster break? because it was made in china

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What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

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Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

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What do you call a black man who has been killed? A dead person.

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what did the guy say to the other guy? nothing because right before he was going to say something he was hit by a truck and got knocked out for 11 hours and right before he was going to wake a plane crashed into the hospital and everybody died except for two gay guys.

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Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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