Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk! Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Yo mama's so white, she's an albino!

Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo.

Black people

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

It sucks if you have amnesia. It sucks if you have amnesia.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

follow @nils_kosmo on twatter hehe

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

knock, knok who's there? ya ya who? yahoo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...