How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

In Soviet Russia life had both pros and cons.

What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

Patient: "So what seems to be the problem doc? Doctor: "I'm afraid you have AIDS. I'm sorry."

why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

FUS RO DAH!!!

Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

A guy was beet by his wife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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