Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was high.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

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What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

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Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

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A vodka please Sir this is McDonald's Ok sorry, a McVodka please

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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What do you do when a dog chews your pen? Use a pencile instead.

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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Chuck Norris doesnt need air to live, Air needs chuck Norris to live. Actaully that statment is a fallacy because it would be fatal to not breathe

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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What did the fish say to the human ? He didn't say anything fish can't speak.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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