Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

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Why did the man drive into the river? He was sleep deprived from working overtime.

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What did the man say when he lost his keys? I lost my keys. What did the man say when he saw an elephant in the distance? There is an elephant in the distance.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a gassing chamber and you are a jew

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It's not illegal, it's just frowned upon... like... masterbating on an airplane.

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How does Moses make his Tea? Hebrews it.

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two muffins were in an oven, one muffin said to the other, " ohmygod! its so hot in here!" the other muffin said,"AHHHHHH!!!! its a talking muffin!!"

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Why? Why Not?

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Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

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What did the teacher say to the kid who got a 0 on a multiple choice spelling test? Wow your really dumb. Idiot

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Why does Billy Mays yell? He doesn't, he's dead.

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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The chicken crossed the road.

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And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf guy ? He didn't.

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its funny cuz i laughed!

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Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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A sober Irish individual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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