What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

Why could the little girl not swim? She had rabies.

Miškinis gerai prikolina.

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

why did the plumber start to cry? his family died

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

meh

Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? Jenga games regularly don't kill around 3000 people.

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

roses are blue, violets are unicorns, this poem doesnt make any sense. refrigerator

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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