What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

do you currently smoke? i hope not.

What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

Why was the man scared? Because he was being attacked by a giant tiger.

What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

A father had three children Rose Daisy and Cinderblock. Rose comes up to her father and asks"daddy why am i named Rose?' the father answered"well when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head"Rose Reply's "oh thats nice" and walk's away. the Daisy comes up and ask's "Daddy! why am i named Daisy!" the Dad answered "well. when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head" Daisy Replied" oh ok i guess" and walked away. Then Cinderblock came up and asked "duuuhhhd" and the father simply replied" Shut up Cinderblock".

A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

Why is wood brown Because wood is brown

My name is Matt and I am homosexual. Just kidding. My names Rick.

Why did George smoke weed? Because he was depressed after his wife died and couldn't get over the fact that he would be lonely forevermore.

A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

lol im s0 gut at spelign at engrish N u laughd n liekd diZ funi joek XDD u most LUV LE MEMEZ n EMOtikons Lol (^-^) y u guyz so st00p1d at math Wtf???!?!? 1+1=8 i m soooo smurt hahaha I <3 warrior cats n dance 2 gangnum stail wile masturbatin 2 swagbois le raeg comicz ;3!! . And now you are dying of cancer.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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