John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was already in the oven.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench. A bench is wooden while a black guy has a human body composed of mostly water.

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politically correct!

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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How do u make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

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Women

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What is black and white and red all over? A black, red and white picture

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What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

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HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

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What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? The one from the farm across the street. Can Randy come play outside?

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Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

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Your Mother

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Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

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roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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