How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

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Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

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Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

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Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

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Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What do you get when you cross a surfer and a black man? An angry surfer and an angry black man. You really should be nicer to people.

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what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

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This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops