what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

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A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

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Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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A lawyer met with his client and said.. well, there is some good news and some bad news The bad news is that you're going to prison for life.

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

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How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

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Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

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Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

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What do you get when you cross 3 men and a chainsaw? Answer: 2 and a half men

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I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

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A man walked into a bar. He said ow.

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So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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