Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

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What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

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Robert had 30 cheeseburgers and he ate 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes.

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Knock knock come in.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

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Your face is hilarious.

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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copy me and i will kill you

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A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

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a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It escaped the zoo.

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Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

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Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

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So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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Why did little Sally throw a stick of butter out the window? Sally had a burning hatred for dairy products.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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