Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

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Q: what is white and can't climb trees? A: A refrigerator

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what is the color of a burp burple

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven died three months ago and was clawing on his bedroom window.

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what do poor black guy and poor white guy have in common..................................................... their poor

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Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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A man buys a prius

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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