Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

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Q.Why did the black man go to college? A. What does his race have to do with anything?

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What did Grandma give little Ben for Christmas? a wheelchair

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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Why couldn't the tractor start? The farmer lost the keys.

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What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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What do you call a clock that has no sense of time? .....Broken.

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A train poops its pants.

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A cow walks into a bar and said, "Bartender give me a glass of milk!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

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Knock knock

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Q: What is the leading cause of pedophilia? A: Sexy children.

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Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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whats worse than jonny james obviously

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What eats grass and goes MMMMOOOOOOO? A weird person that likes to eat grass and MMMMOOOOOOO

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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