whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

Relax, I said some pretty vile things to you when I thought you where a guy seducing me while it became ever more apparent that you where pretending to be me, thing is I often use this site to vent my frustrations and earning the "praise" in the form of red thumbs by the people. I wont say your name, but I know who you are now, the girl with the big red scared eyes, I mean how many one handed 27 year old`s do I know? I am in my early thirties, that`s all I am willing to share for now, If people come around trying to poke out my remaining eye, I am ready (my waifu, is at her mother`s place, she knows I am still a wanted target by, well some people here and there.

I was walking down the street then my hands were itchy so I stuck em in my pockets Jk, I'm a donkey. We don't have hands

Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

Nickelback.

Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

Yo mamas so fat she is obese

If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

What do animals eat at the beach? Sandwitches

whats it called when you see a ton of white people running down a hill.... an avalanch whats it called when you see a ton of black people running down a hill.....a mud slide whats it called when you see a ton of mexicans running down a hill............ a jail break

breasts

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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