A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

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hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

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what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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when life gives you lemons your like wait how did i get these lemons??

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Who visits Satan on Christmas? A dyslexic box.

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What did the man with sores on his tounge get for a birthday present? He recieved a very nice pair of trousers which he wore to work from time to time

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when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

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How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

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Q: "What did the blueberry say to the cheesecake?" A: "I'm not your friend anymore!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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CORRECTION TO THE COMMENT BELOW! Its a WIN/WIN/WIN/WINWINWINWINWINWIN (WIN For at least 30 more minutes)/CUUUUM!/"SORE ASS WHINING CHILD Gonna grow into a slut SITUATION!" friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man The Anti-Christ: Do not thumb me down unless you want to feel the big burning hot spear of darkness, and you do not... You better don`t be or become a sore ass kid you allshole if you know what I am saying... Yeah! Thats right! You better fear me! Because the angrier you look... The more offended you become... The better you are starting to look...

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

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What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

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Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops