neil likes pube toast

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.sdrawkcab siht gnidaer era ouy ,siht daer nac ouy fI

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

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Knock Knock : F*ck im watching porn...

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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adam sucks off disabled old men for a pac of biscuits

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Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

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What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and a refrigerator? Open a refrigerator and you will find food, typically refrigerated food like milk, eggs, you know, stuff like that.... When you open Donald Trump you will be charged with murder.

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

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How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

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Q: What's better than the Call Me Maybe video? A: A shot-for-shot parody of it featuring a GIMP! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFxnAITCv5o

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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How do you stop a car from hitting a kid? You don't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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Are you the only 10 I see? Because I'm blind.

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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