what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

What's large, black and can be found in Australia? A large black Australian man.

What do you call a black scuba diver... A scuba diver.

What did the blondes left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they haven't met yet.

Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

Knock Knock Who's there? Me!! .... me who? Just open the motherf***ing door!! MOM!?! Theres a rapist at the door. MOM: No Jimmy, thats your father

Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

noah is a scrub jungle

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

Where's Waldo? The cemetery, he died last week.

What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

your mamma so fat... she went to hell.

Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

I found a new way to be condescending... Thats when you talk down to people.

How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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