What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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Why did the cow cross the road? The slaughter yard was on the other side!

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How many blondes does it take to dye their own hair black and act in an intelligent, sensible manner?

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whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

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Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

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Whats Worse that 10 babies stapled to 1 tree? 1 Baby stapled to 10 trees

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A man told his wife to go make him a sandwich. She said no.

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:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

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What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

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Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

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What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

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Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

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Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

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What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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