What's funny? Nick Sotelo

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There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

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the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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why was 6 jealous of 7? 7 had a huge dick.

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Vancouver Canucks Hater: What time is? Another Vancouver Canucks Hater: 6 past Luongo

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away? What about the vampires?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Prostitution is bad.......

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what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

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Today is March 22.

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How many girls does ittake to screw in a lightbulb? Doesnt matter as long as dinner is on the table by 6:00

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

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What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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