How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A large Albanian man jizzing on the pile.

What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

Cameron is a r e t a r d

Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

there was a guy who had 2 horses... he entered them into races... they were rubbish... kept losing... so he entered them in 1 big race and said hed get rid of the loser... the horses made a plan to finish it at exactly same time... he heard them talking and said HOW DARE TALK

Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Procedes with his long difficult hunt to find another companion who accepts him for what he is, without the fear of being eaten.

Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

Keep Scrolling Penis Keep scrolling Keep scrolling

Send "What Makes You Beautiful" Ringtone to your CellShowHideSong Notes - Go behind the words! You're insecure, don't know what for You're turning heads when you walk through the do-o-or Don't need make-up - to cover up Being the way that you are is eno-o-ough Everyone else in the room can see it Everyone else but you Baby you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed the way you smile at the ground, it ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! If only you saw what I could see you'd understand why I want you so desperatley Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! Read more: ONE DIRECTION - WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL LYRICS http://www.metrolyrics.com/what-makes-you-beautiful-lyrics-one-direction.html#ixzz1sJdk3KHD Copied from MetroLyrics.com

I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

whats worse than having no life? having no life and reading internet jokes all day!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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