Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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Q. Pete and Repeat were sitting on a wall. Repeat fell off. Which one was left? A. Pete. Yep.

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Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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What's green and blue? yellow

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Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

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A black guy walks into a bar orders his drink and could not do it in a more civilized way

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Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

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Two muffins are sitting in the oven. One says wow its hot in here the other muffin said HOLY SHIT ITS A TALKING MUFFIN

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Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

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A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

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knock knock whose there the hospital staff your mom just died of AIDS

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I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

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Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Neither has he.

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when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops