Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

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Dr. Dick Howard Long visits a friend in England. Arriving at his friend's house, he knocked at the door. A butler then lets him in and asks, "Sir, would you like to wait while the Master bathes?" The doctor then replies, "Sure thing, I'll wait until he's done."

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Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

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That's what SHE said!

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yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

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When life gives you lemons. Don't take things from strangers

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What's black and doesn't work? My Blackberry, but luckily it was still under guarantee and the situation was solved swiftly and relatively drama free.

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to perform non-voluntary sexual acts against him.

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Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

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There was an American, Mexican, and a Chineese man, they were all on a plane about to crash. They all threw off the plane somthing they had a lot of in their country before they died. the mexican sacraficed tacos. the chineese sacraficed noodles. and the american picked up the mexican and chineese and was about to throw them off beacause he had too many of them in their country but then he came to relization that a community with biodiversity is an important factor in life today. i mean, someones gonna have to mow the lawn?

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What do you get if you cross if you cross an overweight woman with a pair of very tight trousers? Exactly that, an overweight woman in inappropriately tight torusers.

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Lewis

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I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

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what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

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How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender

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Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

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When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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Whats the difference between a car and a baby? I would have a hard time throwing a car.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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What do you call a pile of dead children? Home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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