Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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People...

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a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

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Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

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what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

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what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

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whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

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How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

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What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

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What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

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Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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