An Irishman walked into a pub.... He never left.

What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black and so is my neighbor

Kid 1: Hey, guess what? Kid 2: Your MOM! HAHA! Kid 1:... My mother died two months ago from brain cancer after being shot in the head while fighting for our country in Iraq... Kid 2:.... um.. Your mom...?

Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

What do you call someone who is unwilfully forced into a life of emotional abuse and domestic violence? My daughter.

Why didn't the poor man buy a candy bar? He wasn't hungry.

Fox News

how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

Knock, Knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible because orange's can't talk. Oh. It's Jim, I need to borrow your lawnmower.

So does Blake

silly rabbit trix are for kids and jews

when life gives you lemons your like wait how did i get these lemons??

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend? My girlfriend is alive and 19 years older.

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, WITHOUT MY HEART I CANNOT LOVE YOU

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

What did the mom say to her clinically depressed son? You're dad died

What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

There was a two car pile up at wal-mart. 50 mexicans were killed.

What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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