Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He is immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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What would Ronald Reagan say if he was alive today? Nice to meet you my name is Ronald Reagan

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Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

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hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

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Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

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I regret everything.....

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MOTHER OF GOD! Someone get this horse out of here!

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your dad called night and told me your grandpa died.

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Do you wanna build a snowman ? No.

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why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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Last night, I awoke to the unsettling sound of an alarm. My initial thought was fire. However, after analyzing the situation, I realized that it was only my alarm clock. I turned off the alarm clock, and got out of bed. Then my brother walked in my room and hit me in the face with a toaster.

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What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

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there was a rich kid strolling in the woods.he saw a bear, HE DIED

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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An american man, chinese man, black man, and a Mexican man walk into a bar. The american man says i want to show you guys a trick, so they go to the empire state building and the american man jumps off the side and comes back up alive. He tells them i will do it one more time, watch closely. So he jumps off and comes back alive. The american guy tells the chinese man to do it. So the chinese guy jumps off and dies. Then the american guy tells the mexican to jumps off, sonhe does it. The mexican man dies and the black guy is told to do it and he is afraid, but still does it, he dies. The american man goes back to the bar and the barkeep says "Superman you can be a real dick when your drunk!"

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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a blond a her blond boyfriend were walking acrossed a river. she gose over the river but the ramp brecks when she's past. her boyfriend says wait until night and I'll get a flashlight and shine it acrossed get on the light beem and walk acrossed.she says no when I'm haf way acrossed you will turn the light off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops