Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

A young boy walks into a catholic church, he attends mass, and leaves.

They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Patient: Doctor Doctor! Doctor: Yes. Patient: I think I'm a moth! Doctor: You don't need a doctor, you need Mental help. Patient: Yes I know. Doctor: Then why are you here? Patient: The light was on.

Roses are red, They are also violet, yellow, white, pink, orange, purple, or orange.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeleine mecanne.

A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

How did Mario finally defeat Bowser? He took Steriods

what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

How do you kill a cancer patient? Throw a fridge at him.

Why was six afraid of seven? because seven has cold, dead eyes.

Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

Why did Jimmy cry? His mom raped him.

Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

why was the little girl crying in her dads arms? Because he was strangling her

How many Ethiopians can you fit in a car? Five in your standard sedan

What's worse...a thousand dead babies in one joke...or one dead baby in a thousand jokes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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