Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

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A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

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What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

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So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

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jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper painted red.

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♪ It's raining. It's pouring. ♪ The old man caught pneumonia and died....

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

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Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

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Why does life suck? Because it does

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What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

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A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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What's dirtier than an ice cream cone rolled in dirt? The dirt it was rolled in.

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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What's brown and adhesive? A stick

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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Why did the black man go to KFC? Ever since the economic downfall Kentucky Fried Chicken is the only remaining food dispensary in a 5 miles radius.......and hes black

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Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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What do you call George Mills? A very kind, sensitive person with a poor music taste.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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