Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

A man walks into a bar and sees a woman starring at him, she seems attractive... he walks up to her and realizes that sheis quite mediocre if not even ugly. He proceeds to say "You'll do"

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

What happened to the boy that got hit by a bus? He was by a 2nd bus, by which he felt no pain because the first bus crushed his lungs and skull causing suffocation and profuse hemorraging.

A man killed himself.

Why did the cat cross the road? To see its mom who was lying dead on the other side

I got a joke for ya. George W. Bush was our president. He is a joke, but no one is laughing.

Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

knock knock whos there? jim okay come in.

What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

Whats small and has Aids? Avery..

Knock Knock.. Who's there? The IRS, you owe $50,000 in back taxes and we're repossessing your home.

Thanks I guess, I do look a lot like that anime, except my eyes are not giant and I got lips and you know about everything else is different, besides I wear blue or brown contact lenses Ohh, and in case you had not already noticed, I dye my hair brown, believe me, there is enough red in me to go around already... Nero huh? Angelo Nero? So what kind of sick parents did you really have, or do you have? This is weird, you suddenly got even more interesting Nero.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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