my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

Even better if I am not here in an hour, lets make it two huh?, I was thinking about you, sleep is well, not something I prioritize well enough at all, probably why I am so adrenaline crazy.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

How did Mario finally defeat Bowser? He took Steriods

Abortion

HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

Why did the woman drop her keys? She was being raped.

A girl falls out of a tree. She got hit by a flying pig.

What did the depressed man get for his birthday? a rope

What was the homeless guy doing on the side of the rode? Begging for money.

Hi what I lug you

Whatd the boner say to the limp dick get your head up kid

Roses are red violets are blue I have boobs and so do you

Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

Roses are red Violets are blue life is a bitch and so are you

why did the man fall? cuz he jumped from a building

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...