A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

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two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

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knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

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U mad?

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Q.What do Santa Clause and a grape have in common? A.They both have beards. Except for the grape.

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What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

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J.D. has 10 vaginas and 2 penis's

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I'm at my grandmothers house right now

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Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

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What do you say if you see a monkey driving a car? Nothing , you run away because primates are incapable to have motor skill and will probably crash within the next 50 feet

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What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

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Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

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Why don't Black people Dream? Because the last one that did got shot.

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what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

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Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

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What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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A man fell off a cliff... He died a vicious death.

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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<!-- alert('I lost the game'); -->

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Why did the Korean shoot the dog? Unfortunately, the dog was suffering from a severe mental trauma it had sustained when it by got hit by a car. This caused the dog to be extremely aggressive and it ruthlessly attacked a 5-year old girl playing in the street. The Korean who was coming home from a day out hunting in the woods saw the girl and shot the dog from long range to save the girl's life. The man was later thanked by the girl's family.

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Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Nothing... (The game.)

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" A few people laugh, but the horse, incapable of speech, does not. He is unfamiliar with this location and begins to panic. In his panic his leg is broken. He is put down shorty thereafter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue...........Im wearing socks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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