What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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I'm hungry.

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What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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How did the dog die? He was put down.

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The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

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Trees are my friends because they welcome me with open limbs.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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Knock knock Who's there No one We are all on the computer

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What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

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pudding

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hey John will you make some copies

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

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what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

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I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

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Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

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Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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