What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

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Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender served him a beer and said "why the long face?", to which the horse replied "neigh". The bartender was later fired for incompetence and serving beer to a horse.

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Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

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Whats the greatest part of buttsex the refrigerators

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What's yellow and goes up and down? A banana in an elevator.

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

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What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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why did the man lose his testicle? he had cancer

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what do the Holocaust and Jeff Dunham have in common? they're both hilarious

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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yo mamas so fat she probably has to wear a gerdle when she leaves the house.

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Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

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hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Alzheimer who? Knock knock.

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Rachel not blowing Robert.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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