What is blue and not heavy? Light blue!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Jim bean takes out a can of- Let me guess- No.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why didn't the blind girl go to the party? She wasn't invited!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a person from China? Chinese, duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What happens if a girl punches a guy? A white man in prison, convicted of sexual assault.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops