what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

why was the boy sad? because his penis was stapled to a coffee table

Who took the last can of soda? I dunno.

Q: What's the worst part of 3 Mexicans dying in a car accident? A: They were my friends.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

Q: Why are asians good at math? A: Because they study with their tutor every tuesday

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't. It's dead.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

What did the Asian man say to the African man Ching Chang Chong

What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

how do you get a clown off a swing? hit him with an axe

neil patrick harris

What is the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa is a fictional character used to represent Christmas, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Bananas can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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