I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

L's I's that took Viagra.

Oh...okay, good.

Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

why was the boy sleeping in the basement? he was brought over from ethiopia to become a child sex slave and was now being help against his will in a basement

Person 1: Can I ask you a question? Person 2: You just did.

How many Nazis does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Their domestic handiness was not impeded by their warped sense of entitlement and racial superiority.

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

Caroline Kelly.

A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ouch!" Later that day, the man's daughter takes him to the doctor because he's acting strangely. The doctor gives him an MRI and the daughter is told that her father sustained severe brain damage from the injury. Now the daughter has to juggle taking care of her father, taking care of a child she bore from a drunken one-night stand, and recovering from her meth addiction at a rehab facility, all while making minimum wage at her dead end job. Eventually she hangs herself, leaving her father and child to slowly die on their own.

What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

What happened when a saxophone hit Sally? She had a concussion.

Yo mama is so fat she could be a plus size model because she's big and hot.

Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

roses are red violets are blue i have alziemers what are we talking about again

Why did the kid die last night? because his mum stabbed him multiple times in the chest.

What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

why was the boy sad? because his penis was stapled to a coffee table

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...