A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

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Why was the dog hairless? I lied, it was a pig.

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Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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Women's rights.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

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If life though you lemons, through skittles at them and say tast the freakin rainbow.

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Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

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10 people walk into a bar. 6 hours later, 3 more people walk into the bar. There are now 12 people in the bar, and one corpse in the dumpster out back.

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What's the difference between? Your mom.

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roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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Ask me if im a tree? No

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Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

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What's flying and eats rocks? A flying rock eater

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I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

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what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

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I said I hate niiggers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops