whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man throws a penny off of a cliff. He is now one cent poorer

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man buys a prius

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Two men are in a bar. One of them turns to the other one and says, "I've slept with your mom." The other one replies "Go home dad you're drunk."

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Want to hear a dirty joke? Mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

thumb_up thumb_down -31

i have to pee out my ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

thumb_up thumb_down -31

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the black man say to the white man? "I like your shirt" The black man walked off and lived out the rest of his days in peace.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What hurts people but doesn't? Child Birth. -Dave Papile

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walked into a bar... Then the Muslim shoots the Jew and blows himself up.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had a small penis

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down -33

giddy goat

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven died three months ago and was clawing on his bedroom window.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did Princess Diana die? Because she deserved it!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops