s

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Relax, I said some pretty vile things to you when I thought you where a guy seducing me while it became ever more apparent that you where pretending to be me, thing is I often use this site to vent my frustrations and earning the "praise" in the form of red thumbs by the people. I wont say your name, but I know who you are now, the girl with the big red scared eyes, I mean how many one handed 27 year old`s do I know? I am in my early thirties, that`s all I am willing to share for now, If people come around trying to poke out my remaining eye, I am ready (my waifu, is at her mother`s place, she knows I am still a wanted target by, well some people here and there.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is funny about family guy?the jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +12

- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's a pirate's favorite letter? None of them. He can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is the difference between a black man and a sofa? A black man is a human being with feelings, while a sofa is an inanimate object that people sit on in order to enjoy comfort and possibly watch television.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock Who's there? Not you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

TELL

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops