how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

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what do you call a black man wearing a makeup? A clown

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Im Black And I Will Beat You Children At Checkers,They Can Be Red

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What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

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What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

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How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

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Butt poop.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

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a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

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Q: what did the white man say to the black man? A: hi

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There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

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why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Q: why do english soldiers have red coats? A: to cover the blood stains, so they can still lead their platoons when they are shot. why else?

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Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

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An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

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Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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