why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

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Why did the Chinese man have a cat in his oven? Because his wife had decided to divorce him that day so he threw he in the oven, and the cat happened to be in her arms at the time.

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Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

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Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

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Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

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theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

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Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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Hello

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What did the Pope say to the old homeless man who asked him for a blessing? Hahaha, no I won't give you a blessing

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Sac

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What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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